with an office. No more client appointments at the coffee shop. I took a deep breath and congratulated myself for a step up the business ladder.
Satisfied with my day’s accomplishments, I got another brew from the fridge, popped a frozen dinner into the microwave, and then went through my collection of detective movie videos. I chose a Bogart movie, slid it into the player and settled down for an uneventful evening at home.
My phone rang and woke me up. The clock read three fifteen a.m. I burped and rubbed my eyes before I picked up my cell phone.
“Handy here, this had better be good.” I gruffly said into the phone and then cleared my throat. “At three-fifteen in the morning, this had better be damned good.”
“Mr. Handy, this is Harlan Cain. I’m in London and I guess I got the time wrong. Did you get my email?”
“Yes I did, Mr. Cain. By the way, my name is just Handy, short for my first name, Handleman. Is it possible you could call me back in five or six hours?”
“No, I’m sorry, but I will be on a plane back to the U.S. then and the plane’s phone reception is pretty lousy. Have you found out anything about my wife yet?”
“No sir. I just got your email this evening. Give me a call when you get back to the West Coast. I need to get as much information about your wife as I can before I can start an investigation. Good night.” I hung up before he could reply. What an asshole. He didn’t know how to add eight hours to his time in London? I turned over and went back to sleep.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Port Sonoma
had worked with him when I delved into pot growers’ financial records. He was the man who taught me to always follow the money. I whipped out an email to him and promised to pay him fifty bucks for any info on Doyle.
Then I opened the Cain email. He had been referred to me by Uncle Willie, who was a minor investor in Cain’s company, 4EVERFUN GAMES. Cain was married to a woman named Mariah and had made her vice-president of the computer game company.
He thought his wife Mariah was in an affair with someone or had made deals behind his back to build up a cash reserve for when she divorced him. She had signed a pre-nuptial agreement that gave her only ten percent of their company if they split up.
He said he believed the company manager was his wife’s boyfriend. Cain said she was very attractive and “sexually dynamic”. He offered me twenty-five hundred dollars if I would take the case.
The red lights popped into my mind again because clients usually didn’t offer that kind of money upfront. But the prospect of twenty-five hundred dollars turned off the lights. I emailed Cain with my cell phone number and told him to call me and set up a meeting.
Then I pulled a note out of my wallet. As I walked out of One More Cup after my talk with the mayor, I noticed a for rent sign in the window on the second floor of the building across the street from the coffee house. I wrote down the number. When I called the number, I got hold of the leasing agent Mr. Gardner. He gave me detailed information about the office and it piqued my interest. We made an appointment to meet the next morning. I would now have a legitimate business complete
Then I opened the Cain email. He had been referred to me by Uncle Willie, who was a minor investor in Cain’s company, 4EVERFUN GAMES. Cain was married to a woman named Mariah and had made her vice-president of the computer game company.
He thought his wife Mariah was in an affair with someone or had made deals behind his back to build up a cash reserve for when she divorced him. She had signed a pre-nuptial agreement that gave her only ten percent of their company if they split up.
He said he believed the company manager was his wife’s boyfriend. Cain said she was very attractive and “sexually dynamic”. He offered me twenty-five hundred dollars if I would take the case.
The red lights popped into my mind again because clients usually didn’t offer that kind of money upfront. But the prospect of twenty-five hundred dollars turned off the lights. I emailed Cain with my cell phone number and told him to call me and set up a meeting.
Then I pulled a note out of my wallet. As I walked out of One More Cup after my talk with the mayor, I noticed a for rent sign in the window on the second floor of the building across the street from the coffee house. I wrote down the number. When I called the number, I got hold of the leasing agent Mr. Gardner. He gave me detailed information about the office and it piqued my interest. We made an appointment to meet the next morning. I would now have a legitimate business complete
Port Sonoma
I had tweaked my security program and I finally figured how to screen out all the spam that bombarded my e-mail box. There was an email from Roger Hillerman with info on the mayor’s donor and another one from someone named Harlan Cain.
I opened the Hillerman email first. The donor’s name was Rocky Doyle. I opened up a search engine and entered his name. The info that came up was from a local newspaper article that reported he had recently bought the Simenon vineyards under the business name, RD Investments.
The Simenon family had migrated to this area in the eighteen-nineties from France. They had operated one of the biggest dairies in the county until the early nineteen-seventies when one of the family members had the good sense to test the soil to see if it was good for grapevines. It was. They sold off their dairy cows and planted over five hundred acres of pinot noir grapes. Ten years later their wine won awards around the world.
Since the vineyard and Doyle’s companies were privately held, the sale price was not publicly disclosed. But vineyard acreage in Sonoma County sold for over one hundred thousand dollars an acre, so Doyle must have paid about fifty million dollars for the winery.
I did a search of his company’s name and came up with a blank. Who was this guy and where did he get his money? It was time to contact Stewart. Stewart Ellroy worked as a financial investigator for the County Attorney’s office. I had worked with him when I delved into pot growers’ financial records. He was the
I opened the Hillerman email first. The donor’s name was Rocky Doyle. I opened up a search engine and entered his name. The info that came up was from a local newspaper article that reported he had recently bought the Simenon vineyards under the business name, RD Investments.
The Simenon family had migrated to this area in the eighteen-nineties from France. They had operated one of the biggest dairies in the county until the early nineteen-seventies when one of the family members had the good sense to test the soil to see if it was good for grapevines. It was. They sold off their dairy cows and planted over five hundred acres of pinot noir grapes. Ten years later their wine won awards around the world.
Since the vineyard and Doyle’s companies were privately held, the sale price was not publicly disclosed. But vineyard acreage in Sonoma County sold for over one hundred thousand dollars an acre, so Doyle must have paid about fifty million dollars for the winery.
I did a search of his company’s name and came up with a blank. Who was this guy and where did he get his money? It was time to contact Stewart. Stewart Ellroy worked as a financial investigator for the County Attorney’s office. I had worked with him when I delved into pot growers’ financial records. He was the
Port Sonoma
decaying bodies had alerted port security. They raided the company whose name was on the bill of lading and it was owned by her boyfriend. She turned prosecutor’s witness against him.
After the investigation, Pearl met and fell in love with a U.N. special envoy who worked on human trafficking. When the trial was over and her ex-boyfriend was executed, she and the envoy moved to the United States and were married. Two years later he was murdered by Turkish slave traders in Northern Italy.
At my post office mailbox there was an envelope from Uncle Willie among my usual bills and offers from credit card companies. I opened it and saw a check for twenty-five hundred dollars. I had only charged him two thousand. He must have really appreciated the information that Pearl’s testimony against her boyfriend had led to his execution. I could put that five hundred dollar bonus to good use.
I called a cab to take me to Sammy’s so I could pick up my bike. As usual he gave me a big discount for the repair job. After I stopped by the bank, I pulled into the rear carport three apartment buildings down from mine and across the street. I needed to be more careful.
I walked down the back alley to the apartments across from mine. I climbed up to the third floor and scoped out my building. When I didn’t see anyone suspicious, I went back to my bike, and then drove to the carport of my building and parked in my space.
I went up to my apartment and carefully looked around for anything that wasn’t kosher. I unlocked the door, grabbed a beer from the fridge, and sat down at my computer. After I logged on I checked my email.
After the investigation, Pearl met and fell in love with a U.N. special envoy who worked on human trafficking. When the trial was over and her ex-boyfriend was executed, she and the envoy moved to the United States and were married. Two years later he was murdered by Turkish slave traders in Northern Italy.
At my post office mailbox there was an envelope from Uncle Willie among my usual bills and offers from credit card companies. I opened it and saw a check for twenty-five hundred dollars. I had only charged him two thousand. He must have really appreciated the information that Pearl’s testimony against her boyfriend had led to his execution. I could put that five hundred dollar bonus to good use.
I called a cab to take me to Sammy’s so I could pick up my bike. As usual he gave me a big discount for the repair job. After I stopped by the bank, I pulled into the rear carport three apartment buildings down from mine and across the street. I needed to be more careful.
I walked down the back alley to the apartments across from mine. I climbed up to the third floor and scoped out my building. When I didn’t see anyone suspicious, I went back to my bike, and then drove to the carport of my building and parked in my space.
I went up to my apartment and carefully looked around for anything that wasn’t kosher. I unlocked the door, grabbed a beer from the fridge, and sat down at my computer. After I logged on I checked my email.
Port Sonoma
have to dig deeper.” I said. “I have to pay extra for info from some websites and sources. If I have to do field work, such as follow someone, or if I have to go into the City to investigate a lead, I charge two hundred dollars a day plus expenses.”
“That sounds reasonable,” she said. “I’ll have my campaign manager, Roger Hillerman, email the information to you. If it appears there will be extra charges, just contact him with the details.”
I raised my cup in Lee’s direction for a refill. She weaved her way through the tables with a pitcher of hot coffee.
“Warm up?” she asked. I nodded. “Mayor Hammett, do you need a refill?”
“No thank you. It’s time to earn the taxpayer’s dollar. Roger or I will be in touch, Handy.” She said.
I raised my cup to salute her as she rose from her seat, grabbed her purse and walked out the side door of the coffeehouse. She had a nice figure that drew stares from other men in the room.
“Thanks, Lee. I just paid next month’s rent.” I then noticed that the mayor hadn’t left a tip. I pulled a dollar from my pocket and placed it under my cup. “And thanks for the coffee.”
It was time to check my mail box. I still waited for Uncle Willy’s final check. Pearl turned out to be a secretive person. I had to use more than my usual sources when I researched her background. I found out she had been arrested and held as a material witness in China, because her then boyfriend was a people smuggler. Nine people had suffocated in a locked cargo container. The smell of their decaying bodies had alerted port security. They raided the company whose name was on
“That sounds reasonable,” she said. “I’ll have my campaign manager, Roger Hillerman, email the information to you. If it appears there will be extra charges, just contact him with the details.”
I raised my cup in Lee’s direction for a refill. She weaved her way through the tables with a pitcher of hot coffee.
“Warm up?” she asked. I nodded. “Mayor Hammett, do you need a refill?”
“No thank you. It’s time to earn the taxpayer’s dollar. Roger or I will be in touch, Handy.” She said.
I raised my cup to salute her as she rose from her seat, grabbed her purse and walked out the side door of the coffeehouse. She had a nice figure that drew stares from other men in the room.
“Thanks, Lee. I just paid next month’s rent.” I then noticed that the mayor hadn’t left a tip. I pulled a dollar from my pocket and placed it under my cup. “And thanks for the coffee.”
It was time to check my mail box. I still waited for Uncle Willy’s final check. Pearl turned out to be a secretive person. I had to use more than my usual sources when I researched her background. I found out she had been arrested and held as a material witness in China, because her then boyfriend was a people smuggler. Nine people had suffocated in a locked cargo container. The smell of their decaying bodies had alerted port security. They raided the company whose name was on
Port Sonoma
th pale blue eyes which contrasted with her gray-streaked black hair and alabaster skin.
“My first name is Handleman, and when I was a kid my friends shortened it to Handy.” I liked her voice which was a little deep and raspy. I pulled out my wallet and gave her one of my business cards. It read: HANDYWORKS, HANDLEMAN “HANDY” CHANDLER, PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR, DISCREET INVESTIGATIONS, BACK GROUND CHECKS: CONFIDE NIMINIS. It also listed my State Private Investigator license number, post office box, web site and phone number.
“Please sit down. My Latin is a little rusty. What does ‘confide niminis’ mean?” She said.
“It means “Trust no one”. I said. I took one semester of Latin in high school and one semester at Port Sonoma JC. I easily picked up the dead language.
“I got your name from Roman Francis who is an old friend of my family’s. I need someone to check up on a campaign donor. I don’t want to get into trouble like Governor McBain did last year when he accidentally took money from a Mexican drug lord.” Her voice tickled a sensual spot in the back of my brain.
“That’s a good idea. The news of that donation cost him a lot of votes and was probably the reason why he barely eked out a win.” This began to look like a good payday. “If you give me as much information as you can on this donor, I’ll check up on him. You can email it to PI@HandyWorks.com, my website.” “I usually charge three hundred dollars for a simple background check, unless I have to dig deeper.” I said. “I have to pay extra for info from some websites and sources.
“My first name is Handleman, and when I was a kid my friends shortened it to Handy.” I liked her voice which was a little deep and raspy. I pulled out my wallet and gave her one of my business cards. It read: HANDYWORKS, HANDLEMAN “HANDY” CHANDLER, PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR, DISCREET INVESTIGATIONS, BACK GROUND CHECKS: CONFIDE NIMINIS. It also listed my State Private Investigator license number, post office box, web site and phone number.
“Please sit down. My Latin is a little rusty. What does ‘confide niminis’ mean?” She said.
“It means “Trust no one”. I said. I took one semester of Latin in high school and one semester at Port Sonoma JC. I easily picked up the dead language.
“I got your name from Roman Francis who is an old friend of my family’s. I need someone to check up on a campaign donor. I don’t want to get into trouble like Governor McBain did last year when he accidentally took money from a Mexican drug lord.” Her voice tickled a sensual spot in the back of my brain.
“That’s a good idea. The news of that donation cost him a lot of votes and was probably the reason why he barely eked out a win.” This began to look like a good payday. “If you give me as much information as you can on this donor, I’ll check up on him. You can email it to PI@HandyWorks.com, my website.” “I usually charge three hundred dollars for a simple background check, unless I have to dig deeper.” I said. “I have to pay extra for info from some websites and sources.
Port Sonoma
half for me. I returned the favor once, when I cut my fees to check up on a club pledge. The pledge turned out to be a member of a rival club. His gang wanted to infiltrate the Devils so they could rip off their bikes and sell them.
Later that day, before I walked into One More Cup, the local coffee shop which is one of my hangouts, I called the girlfriend of the rapper wannabe Armani. I reported that I had not found anything, but I had only followed him for one day. She had not paid me for a computer search. I warned her to be careful.
Lee Carr, who called herself a barista and not a waitress, poured me a cup of coffee. She pointed to a well-dressed woman who sat at a table by the window and told me she had asked about me.
“Who is she?” I asked.
“It’s Gina Hammett.” Lee said. “She’s the Mayor of Port Sonoma.”
“Did she say what she needed?” I said.
“She didn’t tell me, but she looks like she can afford you.” She said. “I wish I could afford her shoes.” Lee always wore black sneakers.
I carried my coffee over to the mayor’s table. I sneaked a look at her full breasts that strained against the tight blouse she wore. But this might be a job so I closed down my erotic thoughts; at least for now.
“Hi, I’m Handy Chandler.” I said. “I was told that you inquired about me.” I eyed her pant suit, string tie and pearl earrings. She was a little overdressed for this joint.
“Hello. Handy is an unusual name. Where does it come from?” She stared at me with pale blue eyes which contrasted with her gray-streaked black hair and alabaster skin.
Later that day, before I walked into One More Cup, the local coffee shop which is one of my hangouts, I called the girlfriend of the rapper wannabe Armani. I reported that I had not found anything, but I had only followed him for one day. She had not paid me for a computer search. I warned her to be careful.
Lee Carr, who called herself a barista and not a waitress, poured me a cup of coffee. She pointed to a well-dressed woman who sat at a table by the window and told me she had asked about me.
“Who is she?” I asked.
“It’s Gina Hammett.” Lee said. “She’s the Mayor of Port Sonoma.”
“Did she say what she needed?” I said.
“She didn’t tell me, but she looks like she can afford you.” She said. “I wish I could afford her shoes.” Lee always wore black sneakers.
I carried my coffee over to the mayor’s table. I sneaked a look at her full breasts that strained against the tight blouse she wore. But this might be a job so I closed down my erotic thoughts; at least for now.
“Hi, I’m Handy Chandler.” I said. “I was told that you inquired about me.” I eyed her pant suit, string tie and pearl earrings. She was a little overdressed for this joint.
“Hello. Handy is an unusual name. Where does it come from?” She stared at me with pale blue eyes which contrasted with her gray-streaked black hair and alabaster skin.
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