Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Port Sonoma

One guy punched me in the face when I showed him a revealing photograph of his fiancée that I had downloaded. When I discovered one woman’s fiancée was an ex-con and a multiple divorcee, she showed me her appreciation with a bonus, a night in her bed.
A few weeks ago, however, things took a more serious turn. After I gave a report about his young girlfriend to an older Chinese guy named Uncle Willie Queen, two husky young Asian men grabbed me at gunpoint the next day at my apartment. Over and over the two guys said I was in big trouble because I had badmouthed their friend Pearl Grafton, Uncle Willie’s girlfriend.
Several times a week Willie would take Pearl out to eat at a Chinese restaurant that he co-owned, and where the two young men worked. She had assisted these guys with immigration forms and helped them to get their green cards.
They took me to a garage behind an old house located on a country lane outside of town. I’m six-foot-one, two-hundred-ten pounds, lift weights and practice Tai Kwan Do daily. When the chubby bastard who held the gun put it down to hit me, I kicked him in the balls. Then I grabbed the other one and slammed his face into a metal work bench. I took the gun and car keys and ran out to their car.
Before I started the car, I shot a hole in the windshield on the driver’s side, a not so subtle warning. I took off and drove to a supermarket about six blocks from where I lived. I parked the car in the rear of the store. After I wiped off the steering wheel and door handle to remove my prints, I pissed on the fabric front seat cover. Then I walked home.

No comments: