I LOVE CHILDREN

By Kenneth W. Lock copyright 2006

Children are wonderful-incredible!

When I invite them over for a lunch,

They misunderstand what is edible;

And I gobble them down in a bunch.

I save their eyballs for a late dessert,

They're very tasty with whipped cream.

This happens to children who aren't alert,

They all become dinner-in my bad dream.

Kids come in all shapes, sizes and colors;

Some very deliciously overweight.

With the exception of their hard molars,

Being my dinner has become their fate.

I have hearts and livers, kidneys and spleens;

I eat them all and everything in between.

I deepfry children's skin to make cracklin',

It helps roughen up my voice for cacklin'.

I have hearts and livers, kidneys and spleens;

I like the tender ones not in their teens.

Tasty, juicy morsels fit for a king;

Crunchy, like a spicy buffalo wing.

So parents send me all your bad kids;

I'll puree, then store them in jars with lids.

Sauteed baby fingers-a gourmet's delight,

Is served at my dinner table tonight.